No Substitutes for Good Parenting
By , November 2006
Many new laws are being passed and current technologies are being developed to create a constant monitoring system over our teens. Cell phones are now equipped with GPS systems so that parents know exactly where their teens are at all times (or at least where their cell phones are). Many cities are passing curfew laws so that teens cannot be on the streets during school hours. Almost every public school in America is equipped with at least one police officer monitoring arrivals and exiting students; most high school students are no longer allowed to leave campus for lunch. Many states have also passed laws that teens cannot drive with other teens in the car until they are 18.
As for on campus activity, many schools are lobbying for the ban of cell phones in school, saying they are a distraction and can be used to cheat. Computer activity is also under much scrutiny. At home, parents can purchase software that monitors everything teens type. Furthermore, the House of Representatives passed legislation in July that would forbid minors from using MySpace, Facebook and other social networking Internet sites in school libraries and public libraries. The American Library Association is lobbying against the proposal, saying it is so vaguely written that libraries would have to block access to any website with a forum or chat room.
Extra-curricular activities are even becoming a hassle. In El Dorado, Kansas, students are required to agree to participate in random drug testing in order to do anything but go to class. This includes joining clubs, attending school functions, and parking on campus. In 18 states, minors even have to have parental permission to use tanning beds because of the risk of cancer.
Is all of this a little overwhelming? Imagine if you were a teenager. What message are we sending to our children? One of distrust, disapproval, and detachment. We are relying too much on legislation and technology instead of good parenting skills. In an article by USA Today, Marguerite Kondracke, president of America’s Promise, a child-advocacy coalition, says, “Young people are deemed to be unsafe, and so we overreact. Instead of old-fashioned parental discipline, safe neighborhoods, safe schools because enough adults are paying attention, we expect the policemen, laws, and Congress to take care of our children for us. We cannot expect that technology and legislation can substitute for parental involvement.”
Maybe it’s time to take along hard look at yourself as a parent and evaluate your situation. Set clear boundaries and rules, as well as strict consequences for breaking them. After all, no amount of monitoring or controlling can substitute for good, old-fashioned discipline.
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